Vance turns 3!

My baby turns three tomorrow.  I feel like the enormity of it has not yet settled into my brain and heart.  Shouldn't I be looking back in nostalgia?  Instead I am forced to be in the all important present moment because Vance is so good at keeping me in that space.  That is why I need to reflect in writing.  Everyday he amazes me more, and although some days I wish I could press the "fast forward to daddy getting home from work and taking you off of my hands" button on our non existent life remote, I always look forward to our cozy bedtime routine of stories and cuddles.

I still remember the day he was born, and even though my birth experience was not the powerful natural birth I had with Caroline, I am still proud of the day I became a mother.  I saw, for the first time, my heart leaving my body in the form of a squirming, little human.  And then I heard that wonderful cry, the cry that only newborns can make.  It is not the loud, piercing cry that comes later.  It is almost more muffled, more innocent, and all it means is "hold me and love me".  Such a pure love.  I remember seeing a tear roll down JWs face as we looked into Vance's eyes for the first time.  He was perfect to us, and the only thing that we cared about in that moment.

Any hardships we had in those first few years (and there were a few) were minuscule compared to our love for him.  We have such a wonderful gift in our son.  He has blossomed into a goofy, imaginative child.  His favorite color is, and always will be, orange.  He wants to be a pirate when he grows up and could spend an entire day playing dinosaurs.  Ask what his favorite birthday present is and he will tell you cake.  I asked him if he knew how to swim the other day and he said "no, but I know how to make scuba divers".

 He is still a baby really, with that innocent view of the world.  I know each year that will fade a little more as he grows up and finds his place in the universe.  My hope for him is that he can keep a little piece of it, though, because if you let it get lost in the whole "growing up" thing, life just isn't as much fun.  Happy birthday Vance, my love!!!!!